Kinky, Poly, and BDSM lifestyles

Are you looking for a counselor who is okay with your kinky lifestyle? Do you need a confidant who you can relate to, someone who doesn’t judge you or tell you what you are doing is wrong? Have you had counselors give you “that look” that says they don’t get it? You need a counselor who can understand this lifestyle from a supportive perspective, not one that doesn’t agree with your choices.

You don’t need a judgmental therapist. There is no hierarchy in my office; you and I become a team to work on what is bugging YOU. Would you reveal your private secrets to someone who views you as sick, broken, or less-than? Of course not. It seems odd that any counselor should present themselves as an authority figure to their clients, but yet, this is what many clients with unconventional behavior have reported experiencing with other counselors. If therapy is going to work, you need to be honest. I can be that equal peer who is on your side, who knows how to be healthy in your chosen lifestyle. I’m not a boss or a doctor figure you become subservient to.

People engaging in kinky behaviors and unconventional relationships are tired of being stigmatized. We have community and family and emotional situations, just like everyone else. Any authentic healing must include honest discussion of a person’s lifestyle choices. How can you tell any counselor about your life if you have to educate your counselor about your intimate community or your recreational activities? Who needs to feel judged when your emotions are in an uproar?

Let’s take the stigma out of communicating about the dynamics of your sex life. Open, honest acceptance of whatever turns you on—without shame or rejection—is the key to emotional understanding, and understanding is the first step to healing.